June 30, 2020 • bachelor insider
Clare Crawley's Powerful Reason Why She Refuses to 'Settle'
Clare Crawley knows what she deserves, and she's not going to accept anything less!
On part two of her "Bachelor Happy Hour" interview, Clare opened up to Rachel Lindsay and Becca Kufrin about advice she'd give to women looking for love at her age and how she follows that guidance herself.
Rachel called her a "role model" for other women despite the fact that her season hasn't even started filming yet, saying, "There will be a lot of women who come to you asking you for advice about life and what is it like to be a single woman in their 30s who has their career who maybe hasn’t found the man of their life."
She asked Clare what advice she would give to women to want their happy ending but haven't found it quite yet.
Clare responded, "I laugh at people when they say, 'I can’t believe you’re 39 and single! You’re desperate,' or this or that. The best piece of advice I can say is I personally would rather be spending 20 years with the man of my dreams being wholly loved for who I am rather than 50, 60 years with the wrong man."
The Season 16 Bachelorette emphasized that although it might take "extra time," it's vital to "let yourself be loved by the right person."
She analyzed, "A lot of people have said, 'You’re so picky.' I’ve been told so many times by my friends to settle. I would rather love myself enough by myself than to be with the wrong person because trust me, I have been with the wrong person. I have been in those relationships and they are exhausting and draining. They deplete and take away from who you are."
Clare continued, "I would rather spend a shorter amount of time with a man who lifts me up rather than a longer time with the wrong person."
The California native explained that "being 39 and single" isn't anything to look down upon. Instead, she thinks there are "so many perks" about it.
"I can sleep in as late as I want, I have no kids bothering me, I can travel wherever I want to go," she said. "I’m not sitting here on a Friday night going, 'What can I do?' I’m not having pity parties by any means."
During the first part of her "Bachelor Happy Hour" interview, Clare theorized why she thought love "hasn't stuck" for her.
"I picked a lot of wrong guys for me, but that is because I wasn’t in the space to fully understand self-love," she explained.
Clare added, "It wasn’t until recently that I allowed myself to let my guard down and say, 'I want the man of my dreams to see the worst of me, to know the worst of me.' Not to have compassion but to see it’s not always easy, confident, strong and empowered. There’s a lot that I went through, and I want them to know the hard, ugly, embarrassing struggles of my life to appreciate the woman that I am today."
In terms of a future husband, Clare hopes to find somebody who will stand by her side through the good and the bad times. She told Becca and Rachel, "I don’t ask anything of any man that I don’t bring to the table. I’m the one that steps up and does what needs to be done, and I want a man that will do the same. When things get tough, they don’t run away."
To hear the rest of Clare's interview with Rachel and Becca, be sure to listen to the full "Bachelor Happy Hour" episode now! Don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen to podcasts.